Lost Soul

I lost my soul a thousand times before.

I walked the night relying on stars to guide my way, never finding their light helpful.

I saw my previous kin feast on the remains of my heart because of how glorious it looked in their teeth.

I watched my heart being torn to pieces by my relentless ego. I heard it take its last beat.

My body shivering in a call for the only drug that offered relief;
Lost in peace but demanding human touch;
Scared of harmony and searching for the bounds of humanity.

I have watched my mind drift away;
Witnessing Lunacy’s patient and sly takeover;
Begging for Mercy to take my last breath, in a plea for decency.

I have driven my loved ones away;
For fear of losing myself in them;
Feeling mighty from not being the one to stay;
I have been my worst enemy.

I have lain in bed basking in hatred of myself;
I have revelled in a utopia that would allow me to disappear;

I have flown away to a same and yet different sky;
Both failing and succeeding in reinventing myself.

Midnight has come and gone without the relief of dreams;
I have been trapped in the nightmare that is Earth because I was foolish enough to fall from the Heavens to experiment life.

But, one day, I found my soul back;
It was hiding in the darkness surrounding your light;

I had been there this whole time.
Trying to build a web of dreams, my hand reaching out in the night;
It was when I found my heart that I knew it was yours I was looking for;
The connection of our souls brought me back.

***

I lost my soul on my way from the Heavens to Earth;
I found it back on the way leading up to you.

 

~ Val.

(photo credit: Christopher See Hoye)